Sunday, July 27, 2008

How Funny Life Can Be

It's funny how life rolls along some times. Just when things seem to be going just right, life throws you a curve ball or two and it all goes haywire. Then you don't know which way is up, or which way to turn. The worst part could be if you don't really know what is all going on around you; and if you don't know that, you truly have some serious pondering to do. Where did this all begin, and where do you think you want this to go.... and best of all - where do you think or rather want this to end up.

Early last week footboy mysteriously turned up again after well over a year being MIA. This in a rather weird way put a bump in the road, but then made me ponder a few things as well. It also made me look back on a few things and take inventory on a few things in my life, but it also made me look back on a few things in my life that used to be. As this was all going on i was thinking to myself OMG, what is going on in my life right now.... where do i want to go? What do i need? Where do i really want things to go and where? Yes, a lot of thoughts ran through my head at once, and it was a mess at first. But to top that off with a lil cherry - i was also in the middle of going over the whole "where the heck were you footboy, and why the frig didn't you call or pass on a note?" Never make anyone worry like that, doesn't matter who it is, people do care. We are dealing with that now. That will be updated at a later date, when 'fb' has had time to reflect over things. But i am not sure if this is what i want now in my life at this time, not where i am going. i just jumped on this path in the last lil while, and i haven't even gotten a good stride on it yet... let alone part way down the walk. So i am slightly indifferent as to what i am going to do, and where this is going. But i am certain that i am going to pass on fb to someone, as i do think that would be best. Let him pay off his purgatory, and go from there.


For the rest of me now. i am still my lil 'ol me. Just not certain of the path, as for some reason it is getting rained on by something. i don't know if this rain is going to stop or not, but i do know for sure that i have to wonder if i want to get out that umbrella or not and dry off. And if i do that, i don't think i will ever put it away again. i am getting pretty tired of getting wet in the rain, it is getting a lil much. Especially when it ruins my hair, and everyone knows how much time i spend on my hair. So until i hear from the weather man that it is going to be a sunny day down the road soon, i am just going to stay inside and do things that i have put off for a while now. And i can only do that for so long, as this brain can rest only for a bit then it has to do something...... going to have to find something to do at some point. Especially if i am to keep any of my proverbial squashed mentality, and try to straighten out again. And if my hair does get wet like i think it is (but really pray and hope it doesn't), i am going to get a hair cut. That way i don't have to worry about drying it anymore.

Life has a funny way of throwing things at you when you think it is just going your way. Finally i think it is just right, and maybe i might actually have some happiness in my life. i do have happiness, just not where i would always like it. i have and always will be that person that is always annoyingly happy most of the time, but there is those time that i am off in another world wondering..... what if.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

July Tri-City_Munch/Brunch ( July Brunch Cancelled )


Tri-City Brunch News:  

Sunday July 27th, 08    Cancelled.

 

Due to quite a few people going down to ITW, i have decided to cancel this months Sunday brunch. Not that i am stopping You from going for brunch if You wish at all, i am not reserving seating or will promise to be there myself. i do wish everyone a wonderful and kinky fun filled weekend, maybe all Your pervs be full filled.

Next month the Brunches will continue.

 

 

 

Tri-City Munch: Wednesday July 30th, 08    Still on.

*Every 5th Wed. of a month.

 

 

As i could talk about the Nummy food i won't. Though it will satisfy most tastes out there, from Dim Sum to Omelettes. And i know i drool over the desert area, and i am sure there are a few others in my position; as there are are quite a few choices. They have raised the prices by a buck or so due the gas thingy, i will check for You all. Still a great deal.

 

Hear is the Info:

 

Tri-City Sunday Brunch / Munch!
*Dates Above*
6:30 - 9:30pm (or so) Munches

11:30am-1:30pm (or so) Brunches
John
B Pub
1000 Austin Ave. (@ Blue Mountain)
Coquitlam, BC.
***Again
pls try to inform/email me so i can reserve tables for Us all.
 
Please email me here, or @
TriCityMunch@msn.com

Tri-City Brunch News:  Sunday July 27th, 08    Cancelled.

 

Due to quite a few people going down to ITW, i have decided to cancel this months Sunday brunch. Not that i am stopping You from going for brunch if You wish at all, i am not reserving seating or will promise to be there myself. i do wish everyone a wonderful and kinky fun filled weekend, maybe all Your pervs be full filled.

Next month the Brunches will continue.

 

 

 

Tri-City Munch: Wednesday July 30th, 08    Still on.

*Every 5th Wed. of a month.

 

 

As i could talk about the Nummy food i won't. Though it will satisfy most tastes out there, from Dim Sum to Omelettes. And i know i drool over the desert area, and i am sure there are a few others in my position; as there are are quite a few choices. They have raised the prices by a buck or so due the gas thingy, i will check for You all. Still a great deal.

 

Hear is the Info:

 

RSVP as soon as possible, thank You.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

i'm All Folked Up!!!!!

i'm all Folked Up still.
Though i am finally coming down from my weekend high from all that i did. This can be a good thing, as i was getting just a wee bit tired by the time yesterday evening rolled around. Though it was all worth it in the end, no matter who one feels. i may be still a lil tired (even though i couldn't sleep in today if my life depended on it), my body feels all the dancing that i did at the Festival (and it really isn't all that sore, it's just there from the DDD), i still want to just rock on and keep on dancing (i just can't stop dancing in a weird lil way, not sure why), and i have all these great songs stuck in my head from Michael Franti and Spearhead (whom i haven't heard in a while They used to play the van scene all the time, and were here last in 2003), talk about having a blast dancing and singing to them and not stopping for at least an hour near the end of the night..... wicked). Of course that was right after Beautiful Soul on another stage (before the main stage events) and Dubblestandart, and now that i think is what got all of us there going. Everyone was jumping and dancing and having such a great time, you could feel the vibe in the air. Their sax player could pull notes and play like i haven't heard in years, i almost peed my pants it was so good (i'm not kidding, cummin all the way damn near). The Reggae Hip hop Rockand Jamaican style all mixed up was wicked, but the only way i could best describe it was..... smooth - Juicy!!!!!! With that sax, juicy. Then we all (the rest of the crowd that was there of course, and there were a few hundred of us, if not a thousand by then) went to the main stage for the main events to end our eve, and we rocked with them and others... just wicked and tasty as well.
This year was even better than last year. That is hard to say, but it is the truth. Don't get me wrong, i truly enjoyed last year yes i did. But i walked away this year high on a kite, and i didn't need ganja for this one (but it certainly was a bonus). i love the Fest, i love the people there, there are many people there i know and can't wait to run into when i get there....people i haven't seen in years. But what i love most of all, besides the music, is the atmosphere. Not only can you just be and walk around being all peaceful with everyone, you don't have to worry about anyone there. Everyone trusts everyone, and everyone loves everyone (in the non biblical sense i mind you). We all enjoy each others company, we dance with each other, and we hang and eat with each other, we talk we sing, we jam, and we just have a great time being with each other. Taking the time not to worry about what is going on outside of that space, but wishing our friends and family that couldn't be there were with us. There is nothing like it, Folkin is one of the best things for the soul. It gives one hope, but it also replenishes. In more ways than one. So Spread the love, and please give peace a chance...... we could use a lil.

i can't wait till next year. i'll be Folded Up again!!!!!


ps. 
a few pics to come soon.

Monday, July 21, 2008

my safety zone - A Need. A Craving. Being.


All i could think about today after i finished my pre-M-Bio course today..... all i could think about was laying at His feet.
i had an urge to lay at Sir's feet. There is a need for certain things in me, and this is one of them. i had chatted with Him this morning on IM, and i realized how much i missed Him this whole weekend into today. i had a most joyous weekend which was not only pervy, but tasty as well; and He wasn't there to share it with me. Not saying i didn't have fun with the girls yesterday, as i always do at the Festival... every year. i dance my lil heart out, and just get Folked. The only way to be, and just be at peace with others being at peace and sharing the love in a neighborly way. Nothing like it around, which is the problem... that is another story.
So as my afternoon went on all i could think about and visualize was laying at Sir's feet. Even having my head laying on the sofa by Him, being in my comfort zone really. With His hand on my head if it may be, but just there knowing with Him there above me and being safe within His world. i feel so safe with Him; never having to wonder what he is going to do next, wondering if He is going to hurt me in any way, knowing that when i am with Him.... that when i turn around or wake up - He is near by. When i was over in His house last, i sat at His feet in the morning when He was at His computer dealing with the photos that He had taken over the last couple of days. This being when i had woken up, and i am sure He was at the puter for a lil while before i got there, but i was at His feet for a short time. It was nice, and just being. But not quite what i am feeling today, even though some may think it is the same thing. It is, but it isn't. 
Sitting at Sir's feet for a short time while he is just doing a short bit of work is one thing. At that time W/we were only going to be there for a lil while, knowing W/we had to go shortly to get me to the station and He to somewhere else after. It wasn't a situation where knowingly there was no place to rush to and be at at a certain time, or worry about anything coming up. i am thinking of a time when just sitting around while relaxing while there is no pressure to do anything, just being. And i can be there, just being 'His' in my safety zone. It is in a way like me having a figurative safety blanky, a comfort zone, a safe spot to be. If not sitting at His feet with my head on the sofa by Him, laying on the floor right beneath Him. This is not something i would do all the time, just because it is not feasible. Nor is that what i want, and i don't think that is what He wants. i don't need to be at His feet all the time, it is just nice and comforting every once and a while. And with how things have gone in the last couple of weeks, with how He has dealt with me in His Topping way - i have an urge, need, want, desire for what some would say. 
Yesterday the 'jrk' phoned me out of the blue while i was at the Festival. The first thing he said what that it looked like i was sad at the party on Saturday, that the usual joy and happiness that naturally follows me wasn't there by the looks of it. i found that rather strange that that is what he saw, as i was in a most wonderful mood and didn't feel sad at all. Though maybe it would have been nice to have a certain Someone else with me, but i was in a great mood and having a good time. Then he asked if he had ever given me a discount ticket for Rascals, and i said no. Well, he was shocked... i wasn't as he passed through 'my' door to give 'you know who's upstairs last year tickets, even told me what he was doing, then left out "my" door to leave. i thought, what ever. So he has one ticket left over and wants to give it to me, i was fine with that. Sure.
So today as i was coming home after (omg- foot boy found me after his hiatus on being on the injury list - this i will talk about in a later post) i got to pondering about why he may have thought this. i had been deep in thought and wanton about being at Sir's feet, and then it jumped into my thoughts that maybe that is what jrk read off of me not knowing what it was. Not sure how he read that, as he isn't really that good of a Dom to read something like that. 
As i sub-consciously maybe emitted this out. Not knowing what was really going on in my head, this all going on as i was watching all these wonderful subs/slaves with their Masters and Mistress's just being. But not realizing as i was having my absolute fun, this is where that thought truly started and not today - it just surfaced today is all. i had been talking to M Eve about Sir, and all that had been going on and how happy i was. Maybe that is when it crept in while i was talking to her and devil bear after all Their play and spankins, and he getting a kollar finally. i was so pleased for him, and new it was all good for Them from here on in. But then all i wanted to do was just be with Sir, and be safe with Him... safe under Him. But it not coming up in my full thoughts until today, when i actually was finally calming down from everything - from the weekends festivities, for my mind finally clearing a bit for a few different thoughts to open up in there and surface. 
Sir said He was going to call me tonight. If He doesn't i know He is tired and/'or unavailable, that is ok. but i do look forward to hearing His voice, as that is what sometimes can keep one grounded as well. In more ways than one. i am very much looking forward to next week when i get to see Him again, when hopefully i can lay under Him - or even have my head on the sofa by Him with His hand on it... making me feel safe again. Letting me know who i am, why i am there, and who i belong to. Just being me. His wench, His toy, His .......

Saturday, July 19, 2008

My Poor One Grey Eye.


My poor one grey eye.<br>
First off, let's start the story at the beginning. 

i needed new aqua contacts. This so i could go swimming at the new pool more often, and still see while doing so. The new pool out in my hood is a H2O/chlorine system, being that it uses the the H2O more then the chlorine to clean the water than the chlorine - thus i don't react to the water as much as the other pools. YeeeeHaw! Aqua contacts are great, as when they get the slightest bit of water in them the suction to your eyes. *insert suction noise here* They still let your eyes breath, and protect them better them most of the other ones out there do, but the best thing is.... you don't lose the lil suckers in the water when have a good dip. Talk about the best invention in the world, and i truly mean that one coming from a lifetime swimmer.
A couple weeks before i headed out of town i called up my eye doc's place to get in a sample pair for my new prescription. Make sure we have the right ones, right size, and right torque. i am not going to fork over the money for the six boxes if we have the wrong ones, and have to worry about what to do next. One of his lil workers says that they don't have those in stock, so she is going to order a pair in for me. No big deal, as it should be in before i leave. Going to the lake you know, and would love to be able to see there as well. (Old ones are a couple years old, and probably shouldn't wear them) The day before i am to leave i phone in to see if they are there, as i have not received a call to say that they have arrived. i talk to one of the other workers there, and he says that they haven't arrived yet. Rather disappointed i was. but the next day my eye doc calls me up to say that he wasn't sure what the heck was going on here, but he actually had a set in the back the whole time. That they didn't need to order a pair in, they could have given them to me when i ordered them. Pfffffft. i am leaving town in 4 hours, wondering if i could make it or not. Still have to shower, pack a couple things, and see if i can get into vancouver and back in time to go to the depot. Hmmmmmm. Not sure. So he checks to see if one of their other offices has a set there, one near by. They do, but it is still going to take almost an hour to get there. Not much of a shave off from the original trip. Grrrr. No new contacts for trip.
Good thing though.
i get my contacts on Sunday this last week in my lil tanned hands. Wooooo Hooooo! With them my eye doc gives me a bottle of solution specifically made for them, and a antibacterial case for them... what ever for the case. i get them home, and follow the instructions to the tee on the box as to how to treat them before i even put them in my eyes. Then on monday i want to put them in so i can use them for a few days, as they are going to be used for what they are there for. Finally my new aquas are going to be used, and it is about time. Right.
i put in the right eye first, as i would always do. This being my one grey eye (at all times). Within a 2 second period my poor grey eye was burning, and boy did it hurt. i could get that contact out fast enough, without ripping it of course. Now wondering what the f*ck, i followed everything right, and the solution is an all in one.... so this is weird. Rinse the bugger off and try again, big mistake. Burning all over again, and the same eye. How stupid of me, i'm not going have a grey eye left at this rate. Perplexed, not knowing what to do, and my eye doc is closed.
i rinse the poo out of my contacts with saline solution that i had left over. Must have used up the last of the bottle, as it is pretty empty by the feel of it and it was close to have full. i used an old case to do this, not sure if it had to do with this new case type either and i am not taking any chances here. After rinsing them for a while, making sure all the new solution is off of them, i think i am going to try this again. i try my old solution with them this time, in the hopes that this will work. Guess what, it worked. They went in fine, with no burning at all (except for the lil bit of pain that was left over from the initial try with the new solution). Now i am just hoping that i didn't do any damage to my poor lil one grey eye, i would be pissed if there was. But there was nothing i could do about it that day, not unless i went into emergency, and i wasn't about to do that.
i get to take my new contacts out for a spin at a lake this past week. Go for a dip in the water, get just a smidgen of water in each eye, not even what a normal amount as i would with my older ones. And they suctioned to my eyes like glue and never moved, i didn't even have to adjust them an ounce. Talk about elation and joy for me, and the clarity was wonderful. This made me extremely happy after all that i went through in the beginning, and subsequently afterwards. Yeeee Haw!
Then i phone my eye docs place yesterday after i get back to tell them what happened. The dude i talked to tells me to come in with everything, contacts and all. And they are going to try another solution with me while i am in the office, so they know that this isn't going to happen again. Ya! Good idea. I get there and lo and behold there is my eye doc, who is tending to someone. i wait till he is done... or try to. The lil lady asks me what i need, so i tell her what happened. Then we all go and talk to the doc, and he even looks perplexed as well. They think it might be the preservative in the solution, but are unsure. He takes a quick lookyloo at my eye right there, no damage. Phew. He goes into the back and comes out with another set of contacts, hands them  to me, and doesn't take the old ones back. Hmmmm. Gets a different solution, one i have used before, but a new version that will work with what i have going. Asks me if i have a saline left over, and i said no. So he said to go and pick up a bottle of it, then rinse the poo out of the first set of contacts that he gave me. In other words, i am too keep them and try to use them, in the hopes that they weren't damaged. Hands me the second set (brand new now), and that was that. Makes sure i was ok with everything, and sends me on my way. Though the second set has a different 3rd number on them, so i am thinking he is seeing which ones fit best for me. Perfect idea in my books.
i walked down the street to the lil pharmacy in a medical building. They didn't have just saline solution for contact, so i picked up eye wash. Same thing, i didn't want to take the time to make my own. Today i rinsed the poo out of the 1st set, and they are sitting (i hope happily) in a tube case off to the side for future use. And then i put the 2nd set in with the new solution, and no burning. OMG, Yessssssssssssssssssss. They fit a lil differently, but i will know better when i take them swimming. They will then make a formation to my eyes, and will fit proper after that.

My poor one grey eye is still not totally right. Though both eyes were so dry yesterday, it wasn't funny. And nothing worked. So far as i can tell, the grey is still grey. i hope it stays.
The moral of this story............ check the labels and get to know your allergies and the ingredients on solutions. Especially the 'new' ones coming out replacing the old ones.


Augen nicht ebenso trocken, wie sie, Bonus waren. 
Hoffen Sie neue Augenarbeit.

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Signatures - Thank You Sir, may i have another?

There are different kinds of signatures that one can receive from a Top. What i have is beautiful bruises, bruises that have stuck around for a lil while.
What is it about signatures though? Is it a need that They have to do? Is it a want? Or is it just something for them to do? Marking Their territory, saying this in Mine, and I was here. Or maybe just a reminder not only for Them to see later, but also for the bottom as well to see that They were there as well. This isn't just your regular bruising here that comes with a play session that has gotten a lil hard in certain places, this the Top/Saddist actually leaving Their mark on purpose. They could use a pen, i know a few that do. Using certain words for their bottoms, calling them names of what they are, or how well they have been. Not a bad way to sign, not for me though.
When i think back to these signatures that i have on me now...... Not only do i think Nummy, but i think of the whole play session and how it transpired. Before W/we even played that evening He had warned me that He was going to mark me, and where he was going to mark me. His favourite spots to mark His girls, and why in a round-about way. And during O/our play, one could tell that He was thoroughly enjoying Himself with His work. Of course i was enjoying myself as well, Not to knock what was going on. But it is always a curriosity of what is going on in Their brain sometimes when this is all going on, even though i have Topped several times (just not in a manner to mark in such a way).
In that same evening Sir even noticed afterwards that these marks were already there. This is something that wasn't going to wait till the next day to show up, no. He had enough fun signing me that they were already inking and rising to the top of my skin within the time span it took to cool down from the play. Not long when i think of it all, but then i really wasn't all there. i will have to ask about this one, not sure if He will tell me though. lol. He also took a wonderful delight in taking pictures right away, and of course the next day. Now by the next day, you can only imagine what they looked like then.
His signatures are on my inner thighs. This where Sir likes to sign, His favourite spot. Though He did not leave my bumm out of the picture, but my thighs were where He truly enjoyed Himself. Nasty, mean, devious, Saddistic, wonderful...... Nummy. Of course He now has a slew of pictures of His marks, i wouldn't deny Him this. And even after He took picks the next couple days afterwards, they have even gotten darker. And He even added the remark a few days later.... hoping that they remain a lil longer than usual. Made me think on this a bit, but i can understand why. To make me think on it. Who i am, who i am to Him, what i am, what i am to Him. His. His toy. And after all is said and done after the play is over, His service, His wench.

i thank Sir for His signature. It means a lot to me that He has done these, even though they go away eventually.... and by the time i see Him again, they will have faded quite a bit. i haven't got to the pool because of these, as they were quite visable. But they are now going down, and will be gone soon. And then some day, he will put His signature back again. Why? To say He was there. To make me think. Who is He. Who am i.

Thank You Sir.
May i have another?

Pervy Gardening

Pervy Gardening

Jul 11, 2008 10:04 pm
Mood: dirty,
13 Views

Had a wonderful time in the gardens today. Gardened in a bikini top and short shorts, with a rip in one cheek. Wonder if anyone got a good view. It was just too hot to put on a shirt and pants, and i truly need to even out this tan i got from my trip. Now i am knowing that will take a lil time as this climate is way different from the one i was in, and that is not good. This is muggy hot, and the good one is dry hot. Way better tanning conditions. lol
So i am wondering how many peeps got a good peep. hehehehehehe. Next time i should plan a accidental fall out or something. hmmmm.Oh well. Now just time to relax, have some pineapple and wait for the phone to ring.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

No More Horny Crickets - Sirens & Less Peace.

Home again.
No more horny crickets and silence. No more trees of plenty with clean air, or even the masses of deer that pass by every day just to say hi or get to the salt lick. No more elk spotting, or wondering if a cougar is going to come onto the property this night or not. No more late night fires and guitar singing, no more back woods quading. No more walking to the lake just to take a dip to cool off, or even to float around for a couple of hours. No more - OMG my phone has no bars, and i can't even connect to the net here. lmao.
Back to hearing sirens as soon as i get out of the station that replaced my horny crickets. The muggy heat that makes you gasp for air all day long, and the smog in the air that fills your lungs when you c an breath. Listening to the noise of everyone's cars driving by even as you sit in the silence of your room, and fighting traffic just to go and get a lil fruit. Driving to Kimberly or Camrose to get groceries for a week or two, and stopping for lunch due to being gone all day with that one excursion. Sigh...... no more serenity.
Though i did enjoy my few days of RnR i was privileged to have on my way home. Much needed after all the family and friends hubbub, and even a death in our lil mist. Those days helped me relax, gain myself again, even meditate a lil to those who would wonder, and just "be". Managing even to get more sleep that i think i had the whole trip of two weeks, but knowing it was just the numbers of each night and all the hustle and bustle that had gone on most of the time. i even had the honor of letting go, and then adjusting back to the life i am back into now. Nummy.
Then to my garden i go..........
Hello city, here we are again.
What i was truly hoping i wouldn't have to come home to is all the drama and in-fighting going on between some people in the kink world. Sadly, to my dismay when i turned on my puter this afternoon and went to the first group in alt, this was not true. New threads on old fights, and things that have not settled down. Though i was proud to see some people who i respect actually finally put in some great words that ring some truth, not only of now but what we should be living by from before til now. It is true when someone says that they want to get into certain fights, especially when it gets online and in front of thousands of people. Why should anyone have to get into playground fighting when it should be settled like adults, adults that we are supposed to be. What makes it funny though is when people are called on their mistakes and stupidity, especially the ones that do the most harm, think they are on top and making a point that makes them look even better.
i am not one to sit here and say that i am perfect. i wouldn't want to be, i like my lil flaws and sometimes even the odd lil mistake that i may even make. We all make them, it is how you deal with it afterwards that makes you who you are. But when you go out of your way to actually harm people, especially when they don't deserve or warrent it..... it is just bad form. Not only does it make you look bad, it makes every one around you look bad as well. It saddens me to see what is happening in this city of ours between some really good people that i know, and that it might even hurt some friendships over it all as well. i have never seen it like this, and hope to never again. i have been in this wonderful lifestyle most of my life, and i look forward to living it for the rest of it... be it that i am not discouraged even further from what i am wanting and seeking out of my life and needing. But there are those few lil people that make it hard to just 'be' in most cases, even if you want to try to be in the private party world. If someone isn't gossiping about what you may have done at a party (without your permission to do so, talking to whom ever), they are trying to cut you down in any form they can because just maybe.... your life might be a lil better than yours, or they just don't meld with you and that bothers them and they have to deal with this is a very negative way. This is what hurts everyone around all of us, even the innocent. This drives people away, into their private homes, away from many pervy people that they used to talk to or even maybe even play with or in the same scene. Ever wonder where everyone went............
i was hoping to come home nice and relaxed. Home to having all the bickering and fighting finally over, and maybe even some hurt people mended. And other areas cleared up, and understandings put out so people are not asking the wrong questions or getting the wrong answer if any at all. i look forward to attending the next party, just to say hello to those wonderful people out there. Missing so many of you. Though i am now seeing that some will not be there, and that is saddening. i guess we will have to find a way to chat again.
i pray for everyone to mend in their own way... but to at least mend. If that means going on a trip, finding a place to meditate to find your answers that you seek, or just finding yourself.... then maybe just maybe their might be some sense of healing and stability going on in our fair lil city of kink.
i have been bitten by about a hundred mosquitoes. i even got a lil burned on my face, but that has added to the tan with the rest of my body. Dealt with some sad things that were not wanted or expected...... but we dealt with them, and the memorial afterwards. And my Oldest Niece to whom i was there for the most, doing her generations best quality of nil respect for people who have done so much for her and not really thanking or being there when she should be. Disappointing trust me, and it was not what i thought would happen. But i saw more drunken teenagers under supervision, and not a arrest in sight. This being help with decorum, even though they don't act like they should. Rather wild, and made me think back to that age and go HMMMMMMM. Then it made me wonder who the adults were when reading certain things on line.
But it also made me think what i wanted out of my perfectly perviness. Do i want to have anything to do with the parties and public life at all anymore, as it seems to just cause other people problems a plenty. Could i be happy just "being" in a lil private life at home where ever with whom ever, and occasionally attending the private party at a friends home. Knowing of course that what ever happened there, would stay there and i wouldn't have to worry about my play or actions being talked about to whom ever where ever in what ever manner.... even if it is not true, stretched, or even changed to make the talker look good.
Could i be happy living back in the country????? Where your neighbor can't even hear you if you screamed for help through a mega phone, and you could have a hundred people over for a party and not worry about pissing that neighbor off. After hearing that siren over my horny cricked...... it got me thinking truly hard.
But i think that i should worry more about my pa. Who is really ill, and couldn't make it up for my Nieces special days.... grad and bday stuff. Me being a surrogate mom to her now, i moved the mountains to get there. Dad getting grounded by the docs, and still not in good shape and can't even get to his own quiet private home in the mountain in the middle of no where.... i envy that life some days. Crossing my fingers that he gets out of this lil bump okay, and mends fast. He is pretty much all i have left for immediate family, off set of aunts, uncles and cousins.
There are more important things in life to think about than what so-and-so is doing tonight with whom, or where they went and did what. Yes we all like to talk, and have a good gaggle some times. But life is short, live it.... not in other peoples lives.... or sad ones for that matter. Maybe try to cheer them up and make them feel better, and that might make them help others feel better instead of trying to hurt. Who cares if someone can't go somewhere, there are other places to go. We don't need to make some big political statement about it, especially when you may not know the whole story behind all of it.
Today is a modern age. But i think we need to look back at what and where things used to be, and we all held our decorum. If we didn't have our horny crickets, did we have sirens? Or did we make music instead of war and muck. If something went wrong, it was dealt with, and in a timely fashion without question. That was the way it was, and there was no other way. But now it seems everyone is making up their own rules on how things should be in their world, and everyone has to follow it. It doesn't work that way, as we all can't live in everyone's worldly rules. There was a great comment put up by a Dom/Lord about the "Old Guard" system and how it should be still and was then. i think maybe we should all go have a lil boo at this, and maybe even try to go by some of this again, It just might make merriment in this city of ours again. If we need rules to handle people, then there should be one set for all. And any club or event can do what ever they want.... it is theirs - not ours to police and make rules to. It would be like me trying to rule those skeeters out there, or even the elk to come to the yard every day with her foal. That isn't going to happen, not unless i can speak elk.

i am going to go out and get back to my ripening blueberries. Yipeeeee! Water the much thirsty gardens, and gather the rest of the seeds that need to be taken out of possible seeding. This is all part of meditation for me, as many other things are. Including my trip, and my three days of NUMMMY.

Here is to everyone finding their zen. And maybe some even finding those friendships that might have been lost over the last few months, and if not.... forgiveness at least for sour words that might have been said.
Til we meet again.


"When love goes wrong,
nothing goes right."
Marilyn Monroe